{"id":940,"date":"2022-03-22T09:00:09","date_gmt":"2022-03-22T13:00:09","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/?p=940"},"modified":"2023-03-28T16:29:58","modified_gmt":"2023-03-28T20:29:58","slug":"primacy-of-belonging","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/primacy-of-belonging\/","title":{"rendered":"Primacy of Belonging"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class=\"wpb-content-wrapper\"><p>[vc_row full_width=&#8221;stretch_row_content&#8221; custom_padding=&#8221;true&#8221; custom_padding_t=&#8221;30&#8243; custom_padding_b=&#8221;30&#8243; row_hide_sm=&#8221;yes&#8221; row_hide_md=&#8221;yes&#8221; row_hide_xs=&#8221;yes&#8221; css=&#8221;.vc_custom_1630864580219{background-color: #faf5eb !important;}&#8221;][vc_column]<div class=\"templatera_shortcode\"><div class=\"container-fluid row_section vc_row_cp_lr_15 vc_row_cp_t_0 vc_row_cp_b_0\"><div  class=\"vc_row wpb_row vc_row-fluid vc_column-gap-15 rdy_vc_row-o-equal-height rdy_vc_row-flex vc_row-6953b280365c8172175942\"   style=' text-align:left; z-index:0;'><div class=\"row-container container-fluid\"><div class=\"row-inner\"><div class=\"wpb_column vc_column_container vc_col-sm-4 vc_column_container_6953b28036693807396450\" style=\"z-index:0\"><div class=\"vc_column-inner \"><div class=\"wpb_wrapper\">\r\n\t<div class=\"wpb_single_image wpb_single_image_1 wpb_content_element vc_align_left\">\r\n\t\t<div class=\"wpb_wrapper\">\r\n\t\t\t\r\n\t\t\t<a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/\" target=\"_self\"><div class=\"vc_single_image-wrapper   vc_box_border_grey\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"1458\" height=\"217\" src=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/04\/ASI-Logo.Horiz_.RGB-150r.png\" class=\"vc_single_image-img attachment-full\" alt=\"\" title=\"ASI Logo.Horiz.RGB 150r\" \/><\/div><\/a>\r\n\t\t<\/div>\r\n\t<\/div>\r\n<\/div><\/div><\/div><div class=\"wpb_column vc_column_container vc_col-sm-8 vc_column_container_6953b28036b58418687631 column_vertical_align_bottom\" style=\"text-align:right;z-index:0\"><div class=\"vc_column-inner \"><div class=\"wpb_wrapper\">\n\t<div class=\"wpb_raw_code wpb_content_element wpb_raw_html\" >\n\t\t<div class=\"wpb_wrapper\">\n\t\t\t  <style>\n\/* Style The Dropdown Button *\/\n.dropbtn2 {\n  background-color: #faf5eb;\n  color: white;\n  padding: 10px 14px 10px 14px;\n  text-align: center;\n  font-size: 12px;\n  border: none;\n  cursor: pointer;\n}\n\n\/* The container <div> - needed to position the dropdown content *\/\n.dropdown {\n  position: relative;\n  display: inline-block;\n}\n\n\/* Dropdown Content (Hidden by Default) *\/\n.dropdown-content {\n  display: none;\n  position: absolute;\n  text-align: left;\n  background-color: #f9f9f9;\n  min-width: 100px;\n  box-shadow: 0px 8px 16px 0px rgba(0,0,0,0.2);\n  z-index: 10000;\n}\n\n\/* Links inside the dropdown *\/\n.dropdown-content a {\n  color: black;\n  padding: 12px 16px;\n  text-decoration: none;\n  display: block;\n}\n\n\/* Change color of dropdown links on hover *\/\n.dropdown-content a:hover {background-color: #f1f1f1}\n\n\/* Show the dropdown menu on hover *\/\n.dropdown:hover .dropdown-content {\n  display: block;\n}\n<\/div> \n<\/style>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t<\/div>\n\n\t<div class=\"wpb_raw_code wpb_content_element wpb_raw_html\" >\n\t\t<div class=\"wpb_wrapper\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"dropdown\">\n  <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/about-us\/\"><button class=\"dropbtn2\"><h5 style=\"color:black;\">ABOUT US<\/h5><\/button><\/a>\n  <div class=\"dropdown-content\">\n    <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/philosophy-of-education\/\">Philosophy<\/a>\n    <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/history\/\">History<\/a>\n    <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/faith-commitment\/\">Faith Commitment<\/a>\n    <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/accreditation\/\">Accreditation<\/a>\n    <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/staff-and-board\/\">Staff and Board<\/a>\n    <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/employment\/\">Employment<\/a>\n    <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/get-in-touch\/\">Contact Us<\/a>\n    <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/frequently-asked-questions\/\">FAQ<\/a>\n  <\/div>\n<\/div> | \n<div class=\"dropdown\">\n  <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.sharepoint.com\/sites\/ASIAllMember\" target=\"_blank\"><button class=\"dropbtn2\"><h5 style=\"color:black;\">MEMBERS<\/h5><\/button><\/a>\n  <div class=\"dropdown-content\">\n  <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/member-school-benefits\/\">Member School Benefits<\/a>\n  <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/find-a-member-school\/\">Find a Member School<\/a>\n  <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.sharepoint.com\/sites\/ASIAllMember\" target=\"_blank\">Member School Login<\/a>\n  <\/div>\n<\/div> | \n<div class=\"dropdown\">\n  <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/employment\/\"><button class=\"dropbtn2\"><h5 style=\"color:black;\">JOBS<\/h5><\/button><\/a>\n  <div class=\"dropdown-content\">\n  <\/div>\n<\/div> |\n<div class=\"dropdown\">\n  <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/get-in-touch\/\"><button class=\"dropbtn2\"><h5 style=\"color:black;\">CONTACT US<\/h5><\/button><\/a>\n  <div class=\"dropdown-content\">\n  <\/div>\n<\/div> | \n<div class=\"dropdown\">\n  <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/stay-in-touch\/\"><button class=\"dropbtn2\"><h5 style=\"color:black;\">SIGN UP<\/h5><\/button><\/a>\n  <div class=\"dropdown-content\">\n  <\/div>\n<\/div> | \n<div class=\"dropdown\">\n  <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/donate\/\"><button class=\"dropbtn2\"><h5 style=\"color:#507F70;\">DONATE<\/h5><\/button><\/a>\n  <div class=\"dropdown-content\">\n    <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/ways-to-give\/\">Ways to Give<\/a>\n    <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/donate\/\">Donate<\/a>\n  <\/div>\n<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t<\/div>\n<\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div>\r\n<\/div>[\/vc_column][\/vc_row][vc_row full_width=&#8221;stretch_row_content&#8221; custom_padding=&#8221;true&#8221; custom_padding_lr=&#8221;60&#8243; custom_padding_t=&#8221;45&#8243; custom_padding_b=&#8221;45&#8243; css=&#8221;.vc_custom_1643667117141{background-image: url(https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/06\/About-Us.jpg?id=146) !important;}&#8221;][vc_column][vc_custom_heading text=&#8221;Ambleside Schools International Blog&#8221; use_theme_fonts=&#8221;yes&#8221; font_container=&#8221;tag:h6|font_size:45|text_align:left|color:%23ffffff&#8221; font_title_responsive=&#8221;true&#8221;][\/vc_column][\/vc_row][vc_row full_width=&#8221;stretch_row_content&#8221; custom_padding=&#8221;true&#8221; custom_padding_t=&#8221;0&#8243; custom_padding_b=&#8221;0&#8243; row_hide_sm=&#8221;yes&#8221; row_hide_md=&#8221;yes&#8221; row_hide_xs=&#8221;yes&#8221; css=&#8221;.vc_custom_1630866498823{background-color: #003865 !important;}&#8221;][vc_column]<div class=\"templatera_shortcode\"><div class=\"container row_section hidden-lg hidden-md hidden-sm hidden-xs vc_row_p_30\"><div  class=\"vc_row wpb_row vc_row-fluid vc_column-gap-30 vc_row-6953b28036fd9899561771\"   style=' text-align:center; z-index:0;'><div class=\"row-container container-fluid\"><div class=\"row-inner\"><div class=\"wpb_column vc_column_container vc_col-sm-12 vc_column_container_6953b2803706a281860067\" style=\"text-align:center;z-index:0\"><div class=\"vc_column-inner \"><div class=\"wpb_wrapper\">\n\t<div class=\"wpb_raw_code wpb_content_element wpb_raw_html\" >\n\t\t<div class=\"wpb_wrapper\">\n\t\t\t  <style>\n\/* Style The Dropdown Button *\/\n.dropbtn {\n  background-color: #003865;\n  color: white;\n  padding: 20px 16px 20px 16px;;\n  text-align: center;\n  font-size: 16px;\n  border: none;\n  cursor: pointer;\n}\n\n\/* The container <div> - needed to position the dropdown content *\/\n.dropdown {\n  position: relative;\n  display: inline-block;\n}\n\n\/* Dropdown Content (Hidden by Default) *\/\n.dropdown-content {\n  display: none;\n  position: absolute;\n  text-align: left;\n  background-color: #f9f9f9;\n  min-width: 200px;\n  box-shadow: 0px 8px 16px 0px rgba(0,0,0,0.2);\n  z-index: 10000;\n}\n\n\/* Links inside the dropdown *\/\n.dropdown-content a {\n  color: black;\n  padding: 12px 16px;\n  text-decoration: none;\n  display: block;\n}\n\n\/* Change color of dropdown links on hover *\/\n.dropdown-content a:hover {background-color: #f1f1f1}\n\n\/* Show the dropdown menu on hover *\/\n.dropdown:hover .dropdown-content {\n  display: block;\n}\n<\/div> \n<\/style>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t<\/div>\n<\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><div class=\"container-fluid row_section vc_row_cp_t_0 vc_row_cp_b_0\"><div  class=\"vc_row wpb_row vc_row-fluid vc_column-gap-30 vc_row-6953b28037184235040044\"   style=' text-align:center; z-index:0;'><div class=\"row-container container-fluid\"><div class=\"row-inner\"><div class=\"wpb_column vc_column_container vc_col-sm-1\/5 vc_column_container_6953b28037245420996089\" style=\"z-index:0\"><div class=\"vc_column-inner \"><div class=\"wpb_wrapper\">\n\t<div class=\"wpb_raw_code wpb_content_element wpb_raw_html\" >\n\t\t<div class=\"wpb_wrapper\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"dropdown\">\n  <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/member-schools\/\"><button class=\"dropbtn\"><h5><p style=\"color:white;\">Member Schools<\/p><\/h5><\/button><\/a>\n  <div class=\"dropdown-content\">\n    <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/find-a-member-school\/\">Find a Member School<\/a>\n    <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/the-ambleside-difference\/\">The Ambleside Difference<\/a>\n    <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/curriculum\/\">Curriculum<\/a>\n    <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/employment\/\">Employment<\/a>\n  <\/div>\n<\/div> \n\t\t<\/div>\n\t<\/div>\n<\/div><\/div><\/div><div class=\"wpb_column vc_column_container vc_col-sm-1\/5 vc_column_container_6953b28037377339929037\" style=\"z-index:0\"><div class=\"vc_column-inner \"><div class=\"wpb_wrapper\">\n\t<div class=\"wpb_raw_code wpb_content_element wpb_raw_html\" >\n\t\t<div class=\"wpb_wrapper\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"dropdown\">\n  <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/why-start-a-school\/\"><button class=\"dropbtn\" ><h5><p style=\"color:white;\">Starting a School<\/p><\/h5><\/button><\/a>\n  <div class=\"dropdown-content\">\n    <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/how-we-help\/\">How We Help<\/a>\n    <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/why-start-a-school\/\">Why Start a School<\/a>\n    <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/founding-a-school\/\">Founding a School<\/a>\n    <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/converting-a-school\/\">Converting a School<\/a>\n    <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/how-to-get-started\/\">How to Get Started<\/a>\n  <\/div>\n<\/div> \n\t\t<\/div>\n\t<\/div>\n<\/div><\/div><\/div><div class=\"wpb_column vc_column_container vc_col-sm-1\/5 vc_column_container_6953b28037433944116774\" style=\"z-index:0\"><div class=\"vc_column-inner \"><div class=\"wpb_wrapper\">\n\t<div class=\"wpb_raw_code wpb_content_element wpb_raw_html\" >\n\t\t<div class=\"wpb_wrapper\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"dropdown\">\n  <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/training\/\"><button class=\"dropbtn\"><h5><p style=\"color:white;\">Education & Training<\/p><\/h5><\/button><\/a>\n  <div class=\"dropdown-content\">\n    <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/three-day-internship\/\">Three-Day Internship<\/a>\n    <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/summer-institute\/\">Summer Institute<\/a>\n  <\/div>\n<\/div> \n\t\t<\/div>\n\t<\/div>\n<\/div><\/div><\/div><div class=\"wpb_column vc_column_container vc_col-sm-1\/5 vc_column_container_6953b280374d4779889172\" style=\"z-index:0\"><div class=\"vc_column-inner \"><div class=\"wpb_wrapper\">\n\t<div class=\"wpb_raw_code wpb_content_element wpb_raw_html\" >\n\t\t<div class=\"wpb_wrapper\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"dropdown\">\n  <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/homeschooling\/\"><button class=\"dropbtn\"><h5><p style=\"color:white;\">Homeschooling<\/p><\/h5><\/button><\/a>\n  <div class=\"dropdown-content\">\n    <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/mentor-program\/\">Mentor Program<\/a>\n    <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/homeschooling-costs\/\">Program Costs<\/a>\n    <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/homeschool-curriculum-and-resources\/\">Curriculum & Resources<\/a>\n    <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/homeschool-application\/\">Application<\/a>\n    <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/homeschool-renewal-form\/\/\">Membership Renewal<\/a>\n  <\/div>\n<\/div> \n\t\t<\/div>\n\t<\/div>\n<\/div><\/div><\/div><div class=\"wpb_column vc_column_container vc_col-sm-1\/5 vc_column_container_6953b280375b9671523308\" style=\"z-index:0\"><div class=\"vc_column-inner \"><div class=\"wpb_wrapper\">\n\t<div class=\"wpb_raw_code wpb_content_element wpb_raw_html\" >\n\t\t<div class=\"wpb_wrapper\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"dropdown\">\n  <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/resources\/\"><button class=\"dropbtn\"><h5><p style=\"color:white;\">Resources<\/p><\/h5><\/button><\/a>\n  <div class=\"dropdown-content\">\n    <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/resources\/\">Library<\/a>\n    <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/charlotte-mason\/\">Charlotte M. Mason<\/a>\n    <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/blog\/\">Articles & Magazine<\/a>\n    <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/the-ambleside-difference\/\">Video Series<\/a>\n    <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.sharepoint.com\/sites\/ASIAllMember\">Member Resources<\/a>\n  <\/div>\n<\/div> \n\t\t<\/div>\n\t<\/div>\n<\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div>[\/vc_column][\/vc_row][vc_row full_width=&#8221;stretch_row_content&#8221; custom_padding=&#8221;true&#8221; custom_padding_t=&#8221;45&#8243; custom_padding_b=&#8221;45&#8243;][vc_column width=&#8221;1\/4&#8243;][vc_single_image source=&#8221;featured_image&#8221; img_size=&#8221;300&#215;300&#8243;][vc_empty_space height=&#8221;15&#8243;][vc_row_inner][vc_column_inner][vc_column_text]Ambleside students at the National Gallery of Art, Washington, D.C.[\/vc_column_text][vc_empty_space height=&#8221;30&#8243;][vc_separator width_in_percentages=&#8221;yes&#8221;][vc_empty_space height=&#8221;30&#8243;][vc_column_text]Browse more Ambleside Schools International <strong>Resources<\/strong>.[\/vc_column_text][vc_empty_space height=&#8221;30&#8243;][vc_separator width_in_percentages=&#8221;yes&#8221;][vc_empty_space height=&#8221;30&#8243;]<div class=\"templatera_shortcode\"><div class=\"container row_section vc_row_cp_lr_15 vc_row_cp_t_0\"><div  class=\"vc_row wpb_row vc_row-fluid vc_column-gap-30 vc_row-6953b28037964273138756\"   style=' text-align:left; z-index:0;'><div class=\"row-container container-fluid\"><div class=\"row-inner\"><div class=\"wpb_column vc_column_container vc_col-sm-12 vc_column_container_6953b28037a21531090691\" style=\"z-index:0\"><div class=\"vc_column-inner \"><div class=\"wpb_wrapper\"><div class=\"vc_custom_heading vc_custom_heading_6953b28037baf313040779\" ><h5 style=\"font-size: 17px;color: #000000;text-align: left\"><span class=\"hilight\"  ><a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/resources\/\">Resource Library<\/a><\/span><\/h5><\/div><div class=\"vc_empty_space  vc_empty_space_2\"   style=\"height: 10px\" ><span class=\"vc_empty_space_inner\"><\/span><\/div>\r\n<div class=\"vc_custom_heading vc_custom_heading_6953b28037cd6007383120\" ><h5 style=\"font-size: 17px;color: #000000;text-align: left\"><span class=\"hilight\"  ><a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/charlotte-mason\/\">Charlotte M. Mason<\/a><\/span><\/h5><\/div><div class=\"vc_empty_space  vc_empty_space_3\"   style=\"height: 10px\" ><span class=\"vc_empty_space_inner\"><\/span><\/div>\r\n<div class=\"vc_custom_heading vc_custom_heading_6953b28037dea298584685\" ><h5 style=\"font-size: 17px;color: #000000;text-align: left\"><span class=\"hilight\"  ><a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/blog\/\">Articles<\/a><\/span><\/h5><\/div><div class=\"vc_empty_space  vc_empty_space_4\"   style=\"height: 10px\" ><span class=\"vc_empty_space_inner\"><\/span><\/div>\r\n<div class=\"vc_custom_heading vc_custom_heading_6953b28037ee0192478105\" ><h5 style=\"font-size: 17px;color: #000000;text-align: left\"><span class=\"hilight\"  ><a href=\"https:\/\/www.amblesideschools.com\/main\/educator-support\" target=\"_blank\">Members<\/a><\/span><\/h5><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div>[\/vc_column_inner][\/vc_row_inner][\/vc_column][vc_column width=&#8221;3\/4&#8243;][vc_column_text]<\/p>\n<h4><a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/blog\/\"><span style=\"color: #003865;\">&gt; Return to Articles<\/span><\/a><\/h4>\n<p>[\/vc_column_text][vc_empty_space height=&#8221;30&#8243;][vc_custom_heading text=&#8221;Primacy of Belonging&#8221; use_theme_fonts=&#8221;yes&#8221; font_container=&#8221;tag:h1|font_size:30|text_align:left|color:%23020202&#8243;][vc_empty_space height=&#8221;15&#8243;][vc_separator width_in_percentages=&#8221;yes&#8221;][vc_empty_space height=&#8221;30&#8243;][vc_column_text css=&#8221;.vc_custom_1646166188881{padding-right: 30px !important;padding-left: 30px !important;}&#8221;]<\/p>\n<blockquote><p><em>That which we have seen and heard we proclaim also to you, so that you too may have fellowship (koinonia) with us; and indeed our fellowship (koinonia) is with the Father and with his Son Jesus Christ. And we are writing these things so that our joy may be complete<\/em>.<\/p>\n<p>I John 1:3-4<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>[\/vc_column_text][vc_empty_space height=&#8221;30&#8243;][vc_column_text]Toward the end of his life, John, the beloved apostle, begins by declaring that his primary purpose for preaching all that he had experienced of Christ was the creation of fellowship, a shared belonging in a Divinely oriented community. The work of Christ establishes us as belonging to community, and this shared belonging is foundational to the experience of the Father. We are to be both participants and instruments of belonging, the kind of belonging that creates joy. Charlotte Mason calls this need to belong the \u201cdesire of society\u201d and places it among the desires that are both primary and universal.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><em>The same desires stir in the breasts of savage and of sage alike; that the desire of knowledge, which shows itself in the child&#8217;s curiosity about things and his eager use of his eyes, is equally active everywhere; that the desire of society, which you may see in two babies presented to one another and all agog with glee and friendliness, is the cause, alike, of village communities amongst savage tribes and of the philosophical meeting of the learned; that everywhere is felt the desire of esteem\u2013\u2013a wonderful power in the hands of the educator, making a word of praise or blame more powerful as a motive than any fear or hope of punishment or reward<\/em>. <sup>[1]<\/sup><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>In this passage, taken from <em>Home Education<\/em>, she identifies three primary desires:<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>The desire of knowledge<\/li>\n<li>The desire of society (belonging)<\/li>\n<li>The desire of esteem (to be held in high regard).<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>It is worth considering both the importance and the interplay of these three. \u00a0The desire of knowledge is to the mind as hunger is to the body. Unless it be atrophied, every human has a natural desire to explore those realms open to the intellect, to feed upon history, literature, nature, science, art, other persons and ultimately God. \u201cFor this is eternal life, to know God.\u201d <sup>[2] <\/sup>The mind feeds and grows, assimilating knowledge as food. But this process can be cut short. Just as, for the sake of breathing, a body will give up eating; so, a mind will give up learning when faced with threats to belonging and\/or esteem. While a few might bury their heads in the books to escape the pain of not belonging or seek the accolades of \u201cfirst in class\u201d as a feeble substitute for being esteemed, none will thrive in such an atmosphere.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Positively, we get most of the knowledge not from personal discovery but from communion with others. In Charlotte Mason\u2019s words:<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><em>We learn from Society. In this way we learn, for most people have things to say that it is good to hear; and we should have something to produce from our own stores that will interest others \u2013 something we have seen or heard, read or thought\u2026 It is not only from the best and ablest we may learn. I have seen ill-bred people in a room, and even at table, who had nothing to say because they did not think their neighbor worth talking to\u2026 This is not only unmannerly and unkind, but is foolish, and a source of loss to themselves. Perhaps there is no one who has not some bit of knowledge or experience, or who has not had some thought, all his own. A good story is told of Sir Walter Scott, how he was traveling from London to Edinburgh by the stagecoach, and sharing the box seat with him was a man who would not talk. He tried the weather, crops, politics, books, every subject he could think of\u2013\u2013and we may be sure they were many. At last, in despair, he turned round with, &#8220;Well, what can you talk about, sir?&#8221; &#8220;Bent leather,&#8221; said the man; and, added Sir Walter, &#8220;we had one of the most interesting conversations I remember.&#8221; Everybody has his &#8216;bent leather&#8217; to talk about, if we have the gift to get at it<\/em>. <sup>[3]<\/sup><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>This story is both tragic and beautiful: tragic because a man had such a small world of interest, and beautiful, because another person cared enough to find even that small world and be interested. One can speculate that small worlds come from small communities of interest. If no one cares for a child\u2019s thoughts, his thoughts will become small, and he will inhabit a small and lonely world. Our personal world is only as big as the worlds we share. To be deeply satisfying, knowledge is a shared endeavor.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Teachers should remember this; for, we experience ourselves as belonging to those who are interested enough to share interests with us. Lack of interest destroys belonging. Those whom we hold in high regard interest us. Those who do not interest us, experience us as holding them in low regard. Let us endeavor to find the \u201cbent leather\u201d in every student\u2019s mind. And let us give them a vast array of knowledge in which to share interest. Nothing builds esteem and belonging like the experience of genuine interest. You are interested in what I think. You are interested in what I feel. Not for any utilitarian reason, but simply because you find me to be of value. Few thoughts, conscious or unconscious, bring joy to the heart as these.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>If one seeks to build an atmosphere of belonging, find something in every person that is worthy of interest. Not all thoughts and feelings are noble. Not all are worthy of interest. When we share ignoble, unworthy interests, we may negatively bond, but we do not delight in one another. Two may share disdain for a third, but that disdain contaminates the relationship not only with the third person but also between the two sharing the disdain. There must be no toleration in the classroom of disdainful attitudes and certainly not disdainful talk. Such attitudes and words must be confronted immediately as a dark, hurtful way of thinking and talking. Students must learn that just because a dark thought crosses their mind does not mean they have to accept it. Thoughts can be rejected, and the mind turned to that which is worthy.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>If genuine interest in me (my thoughts, my feelings, my interests, and activities) builds belonging and esteem, it is augmented by appreciation. When someone sees within us that which is worth appreciating and expresses appreciation our hearts soar. Appreciation of others is a habit of mind and so is contempt. All humans are both bearers of the Divine image and selfish, frail incompetents. The question is what we see when we see another. Where does our mind go? Do we have the habit of sweet thoughts, quick to find the good and appreciate, merciful with the flaws? Or are we quick to see the failings, to mock in our mind, and to disdain. What do we see, and what do we express? In so many classrooms, it is only the negative and the extraordinary that get expressed. We hear little appreciation for small kindnesses and small victories, little gratitude for the small contribution that each can make. What\u2019s called for is not praise as reward for success (a response that quickly cheapens), but genuine appreciation for a rigorous effort, quietly expressed. As important as it is to identify student weakness, teachers will never be a positive support if they fail to see and to appreciate that which is worthy in every child. No classroom is emotionally safe where even a single student is not appreciated.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Just as we build interest by being interested together, so we build appreciation by sharing appreciation. We need to hear what we appreciate about each another. In this, the teacher must take the lead. Not a day should go by in which she does not publicly express concrete appreciation for some worthy trait of a student. This is not praise for performance or appearance, but recognition that some aspect of a fine and noble character has manifested itself. \u201cJohn, I see your noble heart to serve others,\u201d or \u201cKathy, I appreciate your sensitivity to the needs of others.\u201d In addition to expressing appreciation themselves, teachers should gently exhort students to express appreciation for one another. Ideas should be sown, and habits cultivated. Expression of appreciation can be made a topic for regular prayer. \u201cLord, give us the grace to appreciate one another and opportunity to express it.\u201d It can also be an object of direct challenge. \u201cLet\u2019s invite the Lord to show us something we can appreciate about one of our classmates. Look for an opportunity to express that appreciation.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>When our classes are not places of shared interest and appreciation, the atmosphere goes dark, and students begin to feed upon one another. Lacking the joys of shared thoughts\/feelings and a delight in one another, students start to feed upon one another. A vicious cycle begins. Increased relational pain results in further loss of interest and less ability to appreciate, leading to further increased relational pain. As relational pain increases so does predatory behavior. Preying upon one another becomes the norm and the habit.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>The teacher must lead the move against such things. He or she must be an anchor of emotional joy and strength, a sure protector. She must model interest and appreciation; always able to see that which is worthy in a child and joyfully to communicate that recognition. She must lead her students in the habits of genuine interest and appreciation. A final note, the daily habit of giving thanks can go a long way towards achieving these ends. Students must give more time to express appreciation for what is good than disdain for what they do not like.[\/vc_column_text][vc_empty_space height=&#8221;30&#8243;][vc_separator width_in_percentages=&#8221;yes&#8221;][vc_empty_space height=&#8221;30&#8243;][vc_column_text][1] Mason, Charlotte, <em>Home Education<\/em>, 100-101.<\/p>\n<p>[2] John 17:3<\/p>\n<p>[3] Mason, Charlotte, <em>Ourselves,<\/em> 73-75.[\/vc_column_text][\/vc_column][\/vc_row]<\/p>\n<\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The work of Christ establishes us as belonging to community, and this shared belonging is foundational to the experience of the Father. We are to be both participants and instruments of belonging, the kind of belonging that creates joy. Charlotte Mason calls this need to belong the \u201cdesire of society\u201d and places it among the desires that are both primary and universal. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":941,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[6,13],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-940","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-bill-st-cyr","category-spiritual-formation"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.4 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Primacy of Belonging - Ambleside International<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/primacy-of-belonging\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Primacy of Belonging - Ambleside International\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"The work of Christ establishes us as belonging to community, and this shared belonging is foundational to the experience of the Father. We are to be both participants and instruments of belonging, the kind of belonging that creates joy. Charlotte Mason calls this need to belong the \u201cdesire of society\u201d and places it among the desires that are both primary and universal.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/primacy-of-belonging\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Ambleside International\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2022-03-22T13:00:09+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2023-03-28T20:29:58+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/03\/Primacy-of-Belonging.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"404\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"536\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"amblesideintl\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"amblesideintl\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"8 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/primacy-of-belonging\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/primacy-of-belonging\/\",\"name\":\"Primacy of Belonging - Ambleside International\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/#website\"},\"primaryImageOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/primacy-of-belonging\/#primaryimage\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/primacy-of-belonging\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/03\/Primacy-of-Belonging.jpg\",\"datePublished\":\"2022-03-22T13:00:09+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2023-03-28T20:29:58+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/#\/schema\/person\/91fc796bc8676ebbc422bbf6685717cc\"},\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/primacy-of-belonging\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/primacy-of-belonging\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/primacy-of-belonging\/#primaryimage\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/03\/Primacy-of-Belonging.jpg\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/03\/Primacy-of-Belonging.jpg\",\"width\":404,\"height\":536},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/primacy-of-belonging\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"Primacy of Belonging\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/\",\"name\":\"Ambleside International\",\"description\":\"\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":{\"@type\":\"PropertyValueSpecification\",\"valueRequired\":true,\"valueName\":\"search_term_string\"}}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/#\/schema\/person\/91fc796bc8676ebbc422bbf6685717cc\",\"name\":\"amblesideintl\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/3b0b3b48f0d028a7a6e1729024969e46c5e148b91760f5d66c6fc25664b941c5?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/3b0b3b48f0d028a7a6e1729024969e46c5e148b91760f5d66c6fc25664b941c5?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"caption\":\"amblesideintl\"},\"sameAs\":[\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\"],\"url\":\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/author\/amblesideintl\/\"}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Primacy of Belonging - Ambleside International","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/primacy-of-belonging\/","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Primacy of Belonging - Ambleside International","og_description":"The work of Christ establishes us as belonging to community, and this shared belonging is foundational to the experience of the Father. We are to be both participants and instruments of belonging, the kind of belonging that creates joy. Charlotte Mason calls this need to belong the \u201cdesire of society\u201d and places it among the desires that are both primary and universal.","og_url":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/primacy-of-belonging\/","og_site_name":"Ambleside International","article_published_time":"2022-03-22T13:00:09+00:00","article_modified_time":"2023-03-28T20:29:58+00:00","og_image":[{"width":404,"height":536,"url":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/03\/Primacy-of-Belonging.jpg","type":"image\/jpeg"}],"author":"amblesideintl","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"amblesideintl","Est. reading time":"8 minutes"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/primacy-of-belonging\/","url":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/primacy-of-belonging\/","name":"Primacy of Belonging - Ambleside International","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/#website"},"primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/primacy-of-belonging\/#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/primacy-of-belonging\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/03\/Primacy-of-Belonging.jpg","datePublished":"2022-03-22T13:00:09+00:00","dateModified":"2023-03-28T20:29:58+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/#\/schema\/person\/91fc796bc8676ebbc422bbf6685717cc"},"breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/primacy-of-belonging\/#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/primacy-of-belonging\/"]}]},{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/primacy-of-belonging\/#primaryimage","url":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/03\/Primacy-of-Belonging.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/03\/Primacy-of-Belonging.jpg","width":404,"height":536},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/primacy-of-belonging\/#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Primacy of Belonging"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/#website","url":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/","name":"Ambleside International","description":"","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/#\/schema\/person\/91fc796bc8676ebbc422bbf6685717cc","name":"amblesideintl","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/3b0b3b48f0d028a7a6e1729024969e46c5e148b91760f5d66c6fc25664b941c5?s=96&d=mm&r=g","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/3b0b3b48f0d028a7a6e1729024969e46c5e148b91760f5d66c6fc25664b941c5?s=96&d=mm&r=g","caption":"amblesideintl"},"sameAs":["https:\/\/amblesideschools.org"],"url":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/author\/amblesideintl\/"}]}},"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/03\/Primacy-of-Belonging.jpg","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/940","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=940"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/940\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/941"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=940"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=940"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=940"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}