{"id":994,"date":"2022-05-13T06:00:53","date_gmt":"2022-05-13T10:00:53","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/?p=994"},"modified":"2024-11-15T18:05:23","modified_gmt":"2024-11-15T23:05:23","slug":"building-joy","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/building-joy\/","title":{"rendered":"Building Joy"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class=\"wpb-content-wrapper\"><p>[vc_row full_width=&#8221;stretch_row_content&#8221; custom_padding=&#8221;true&#8221; custom_padding_t=&#8221;30&#8243; custom_padding_b=&#8221;30&#8243; row_hide_sm=&#8221;yes&#8221; row_hide_md=&#8221;yes&#8221; row_hide_xs=&#8221;yes&#8221; css=&#8221;.vc_custom_1630864580219{background-color: #faf5eb !important;}&#8221;][vc_column]<div class=\"templatera_shortcode\"><div class=\"container-fluid row_section vc_row_cp_lr_15 vc_row_cp_t_0 vc_row_cp_b_0\"><div  class=\"vc_row wpb_row vc_row-fluid vc_column-gap-15 rdy_vc_row-o-equal-height rdy_vc_row-flex 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Mason<\/a>\n    <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/blog\/\">Articles & Magazine<\/a>\n    <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/the-ambleside-difference\/\">Video Series<\/a>\n    <a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.sharepoint.com\/sites\/ASIAllMember\">Member Resources<\/a>\n  <\/div>\n<\/div> \n\t\t<\/div>\n\t<\/div>\n<\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div>[\/vc_column][\/vc_row][vc_row full_width=&#8221;stretch_row_content&#8221; custom_padding=&#8221;true&#8221; custom_padding_t=&#8221;45&#8243; custom_padding_b=&#8221;45&#8243;][vc_column width=&#8221;1\/4&#8243;][vc_single_image source=&#8221;featured_image&#8221; alignment=&#8221;center&#8221; img_size=&#8221;300&#215;300&#8243;][vc_empty_space height=&#8221;30&#8243;][vc_row_inner][vc_column_inner][vc_column_text]<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\">Download a PDF version of this article.<\/p>\n<p>[\/vc_column_text][vc_empty_space height=&#8221;15&#8243;][rdy_button text=&#8221;Download&#8221; margin_top=&#8221;0&#8243; margin_bottom=&#8221;0&#8243; background=&#8221;#a94425&#8243; background_hover=&#8221;#cd8029&#8243; border_radius=&#8221;0&#8243; link=&#8221;url:https%3A%2F%2Famblesideschools.org%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2022%2F05%2FAmbleside-Article-Building-Joy.pdf|target:_blank&#8221;][vc_empty_space height=&#8221;30&#8243;][vc_separator width_in_percentages=&#8221;yes&#8221;][vc_empty_space height=&#8221;30&#8243;][vc_column_text]Browse more Ambleside Schools International <strong>Resources<\/strong>.[\/vc_column_text][vc_empty_space height=&#8221;30&#8243;][vc_separator width_in_percentages=&#8221;yes&#8221;][vc_empty_space height=&#8221;30&#8243;]<div class=\"templatera_shortcode\"><div class=\"container row_section vc_row_cp_lr_15 vc_row_cp_t_0\"><div  class=\"vc_row wpb_row vc_row-fluid vc_column-gap-30 vc_row-6953b229c87d8291508948\"   style=' text-align:left; z-index:0;'><div class=\"row-container container-fluid\"><div class=\"row-inner\"><div class=\"wpb_column vc_column_container vc_col-sm-12 vc_column_container_6953b229c8889328145320\" style=\"z-index:0\"><div class=\"vc_column-inner \"><div class=\"wpb_wrapper\"><div class=\"vc_custom_heading vc_custom_heading_6953b229c898d704075462\" ><h5 style=\"font-size: 17px;color: #000000;text-align: left\"><span class=\"hilight\"  ><a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/resources\/\">Resource Library<\/a><\/span><\/h5><\/div><div class=\"vc_empty_space  vc_empty_space_2\"   style=\"height: 10px\" ><span class=\"vc_empty_space_inner\"><\/span><\/div>\r\n<div class=\"vc_custom_heading vc_custom_heading_6953b229c8af4942429498\" ><h5 style=\"font-size: 17px;color: #000000;text-align: left\"><span class=\"hilight\"  ><a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/charlotte-mason\/\">Charlotte M. Mason<\/a><\/span><\/h5><\/div><div class=\"vc_empty_space  vc_empty_space_3\"   style=\"height: 10px\" ><span class=\"vc_empty_space_inner\"><\/span><\/div>\r\n<div class=\"vc_custom_heading vc_custom_heading_6953b229c8bf0226714235\" ><h5 style=\"font-size: 17px;color: #000000;text-align: left\"><span class=\"hilight\"  ><a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/blog\/\">Articles<\/a><\/span><\/h5><\/div><div class=\"vc_empty_space  vc_empty_space_4\"   style=\"height: 10px\" ><span class=\"vc_empty_space_inner\"><\/span><\/div>\r\n<div class=\"vc_custom_heading vc_custom_heading_6953b229c8cd0677232841\" ><h5 style=\"font-size: 17px;color: #000000;text-align: left\"><span class=\"hilight\"  ><a href=\"https:\/\/www.amblesideschools.com\/main\/educator-support\" target=\"_blank\">Members<\/a><\/span><\/h5><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div>[\/vc_column_inner][\/vc_row_inner][\/vc_column][vc_column width=&#8221;3\/4&#8243;][vc_column_text]<\/p>\n<h4><a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/blog\/\"><span style=\"color: #003865;\">&gt; Return to Articles<\/span><\/a><\/h4>\n<p>[\/vc_column_text][vc_empty_space height=&#8221;30&#8243;][vc_custom_heading text=&#8221;Building Joy&#8221; use_theme_fonts=&#8221;yes&#8221; font_container=&#8221;tag:h1|font_size:30|text_align:left|color:%23020202&#8243;][vc_empty_space height=&#8221;15&#8243;][vc_separator width_in_percentages=&#8221;yes&#8221;][vc_empty_space height=&#8221;30&#8243;][vc_column_text]In the six volumes of her <em>Home Education<\/em> Series, Charlotte Mason speaks of joy over 270 times.\u00a0 This is not surprising, for the consistent experience of joy is essential to a child&#8217;s well-being. Through experience, parents and teachers know how difficult it is to help the sullen child move forward. Ms. Mason would take it a step further, arguing that \u201cThe happiness of the child is the condition of his progress.\u201d Thus, \u201chis lessons should be joyous and that occasions of friction in the schoolroom are greatly to be deprecated.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>It is important to distinguish between &#8220;pleasing&#8221; our students and &#8220;joy-building.&#8221; There is a kind of &#8220;pleasing&#8221; which occurs when we give a child what she wants. But this type of pleasing is ephemeral. It lasts only until the child&#8217;s next &#8220;chance desire.&#8221;\u00a0 We have seen far too many children enslaved by their own desires, unable to accept &#8220;no&#8221;, and tyrannized by the denial of any desire. Such children could never be described as &#8220;joy-full.&#8221; (In no way am I suggesting that we never grant a child her desires. It&#8217;s just that such &#8220;pleasing&#8221; is secondary to more important concerns.)<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>There is another kind of &#8220;pleasing.&#8221; It is the deep interpersonal delight, which we call joy. Joy is the first emotion sought by an infant. For a newborn, the concrete symbol of joy is the delight in a parent\u2019s face. An infant responds to the parent\u2019s delight with his\/her own delight. Such delight stimulates and cultivates the joy centers of the brain. The face of a delighted parent symbolizes to an infant \u201cit is good to be me (the infant) with you (the parent).\u201d Joy cannot be experienced apart from a relationship with another.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><em>But let us consider; the infant is exquisitely aware of every mood of his mother, the little face clouds with grief or beams with joy in response to the expression of hers. The two left to themselves have rare games. He jumps and pulls, crows and chuckles, crawls and kicks and gurgle with joy; and, amid all the play, is taught what he may not do. Hands and feet, legs and arms, fingers and toes, are continually going while he is awake; mouth, eyes and ears are agog. All is play without intention, and mother plays with baby as glad as he.<\/em> (Charlotte Mason)<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>While joy-building must be an authentic interpersonal process and cannot be fabricated by a series of artificial steps, none-the-less, parents and teachers would do well to cultivate the following habits*:<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Smile whenever you greet your children or students and use sincere voice tones.<\/li>\n<li>Each week, take the time to invite each one individually to tell you truthfully how he\/she is doing and what he\/she is thinking. Listen intently without interrupting.<\/li>\n<li>Take a sincere interest in really knowing each of your children and students. Work hard to understand their fears, joys, hopes, passions, talents, and pain.<\/li>\n<li>Always treat these with dignity and respect. End discussions in a manner which affirms\u2014neither deny a failure when a failure has occurred nor abandon a student to failure.<\/li>\n<li>Use appropriate touch appropriately: Grasp a hand, link arms, place a hand on the shoulder, hug younger children.<\/li>\n<li>Discover what brings each of your children and students joy: A time to talk, an encouraging note, a helping hand. Custom fit attempts to bring joy.<\/li>\n<li>When a student&#8217;s eyes &#8220;light up,&#8221; catch his\/her eye. Allow yourself to share the joy and reflect it back. Joy builds as glances go back and forth.<\/li>\n<li>Cherish every child, establishing through words and actions that you are genuinely glad to be with him. If tragically there should be a student whom you struggle to cherish, own it as a profound defect of your own heart and humbly seek help.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>As a final note, many a marriage could be spared, many a friendship deepened, and many a working alliance strengthened by the regular practice of these &#8220;joy-building&#8221; disciplines.[\/vc_column_text][vc_empty_space height=&#8221;30&#8243;][vc_separator width_in_percentages=&#8221;yes&#8221;][vc_empty_space height=&#8221;30&#8243;][vc_column_text]*Adapted from The Life Model: <em>Living from the Heart Jesus Gave You<\/em> by Friesen, Wilder et. al.[\/vc_column_text][\/vc_column][\/vc_row]<\/p>\n<\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>In the six volumes of her Home Education Series, Charlotte Mason speaks of joy over 270 times. This is not surprising, for the consistent experience of joy is essential to a child&#8217;s well-being. Through experience, parents and teachers know how difficult it is to help the sullen child move forward. Ms. Mason would take it a step farther, arguing that \u201cThe happiness of the child is the condition of his progress.\u201d Thus, \u201chis lessons should be joyous and that occasions of friction in the schoolroom are greatly to be deprecated.\u201d <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":1002,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[6,13],"tags":[75,70,74],"class_list":["post-994","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-bill-st-cyr","category-spiritual-formation","tag-joy","tag-parenting","tag-teaching"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.4 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Building Joy - Ambleside International<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/building-joy\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Building Joy - Ambleside International\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"In the six volumes of her Home Education Series, Charlotte Mason speaks of joy over 270 times. 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